the blogger

howdy!

my name is jenn. seven years ago, i created this blog. my coworkers helped me name it. they chose six words—crass, critical, direct, quirky, picky and smartassed—to describe me, which i used for the web address, the title and my screen name.

i am a texan and an aries. i’m allergic to animal dander and lanolin, which means i want seven dogs—because we always want what we can’t have, and i’m not talking about little dogs, either … i’m talking about french mastiffs and akitas—and buying skin and hair care products sucks.

once i was a size two. of course, i smoked then. i don’t do that anymore. nor do i tan. ever. this would be because i’m welsh, english, irish, scot, austrian and swiss. fair-skinned and freckled. sometimes, in the right light, my hair even looks reddish, though this happens less frequently.

probably because i work two jobs, and, if i can squeeze it into my day, i cop a squat at the bar of a restaurant (lately it’s pappadeaux’s) to churn out a few pages of the novel that i may or may not ever finish. you can read snippets of it here.

i studied liberal arts at cottey college, a teeny-tiny women’s college in the middle of nowhere, then english and studio art at sam houston state university. i LOVE texas a & m. i detest texas university (not to be confused with texas state university, though i don’t much care for it, either) and florida university (mostly because tim tebow is a punk and has forever turned me against that school … unless they’re playing texas).

my favorite color is green. i like polo’s romance for women and abercrombie & fitch’s eight. i don’t like using numerical symbols for numbers. nor do i like capital letters.

the six things i could never live without are art, fiction, film, football, music and photography. i blog about these things. a lot. my favorite city is london.

i drink way too much iced tea and coca-cola. once upon a time, i was down to three cokes a year. this was a miraculous feat, and i’m not entirely sure it could be repeated.

i like to swear. i do it a lot. i remember using foul language when we were living in hawkins, texas, which is way up north by tyler, which is by dallas. we moved away from there when i was eight, so ... i've been doing it for a long time. note the picture. apparently, i learned hand gestures much more easily and at a much younger age.

three best qualities? intelligence, compassion and generosity. three worst? insecurity, laziness and temper. the three words others have used to describe me that i like best are effervescent, bright and inspiring.

the best posts for getting to know me are the griffin inquisition and random quarter.

find me here:

3091 college park drive, suite no. 240-43

the woodlands, texas 77384

criticalcrass@me.com.

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