mismatch monday

April 24, 2017

things found while perusing the profiles on match this week:

i have no children of my own but have been a father and love it... if i like your pic or fav ya or something it means cv i'm interested. .. i'm more likely to do that and if you don't like mine back what's the point in writing ya?

the word laidback (or its alterego easy-going) is in EVERY other profile, by the way. the last guy i dated described himself as thus, and i can guarandamntee you, that's the LAST word i'd use to describe him. so when i see things like:

i'm very laidback but very driven...

i'm all of COURSE you are. and then i click next...

to round this out i'm looking for my partner in crime. someone kind, compassionate, intelligent, witty, wonderful, giving, generous, self-assured, modest, humble, outgoing.

raise your hands if you can see the synonyms.

also, there's a guy who's lied about his age, claiming he's forty-four so he can show up in certain search results, but really he's forty-six. it's two years, yall. it's not that i give a shit about two years. it's that seriously? you're gonna lie about that? what other stories can you tell?

what's bugging me the most, though, is that i'm looking at the profiles of dudes in their fifties and trying to talk myself into the notion that fifty's not so bad.

the fuck it is. i don't give a shit if it's only six years away. THE FUCK IT IS.

i don't use plenty of fish, by the way. that site's the WORST. 

1 comment :

  1. I've got a hang-up about that "50" number too. Why? Like you said, it's not that far away for us.