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what i wish i could say

July 31, 2010

this morning, as a friend and i were chatting about literature and film, i was researching banned books. one of the top ten most challenged titles of two thousand nine is the perks of being a wallflower by stephen chbosky. it's classified as fiction and shelved in the adult fiction section. lots of adolescents read it, though. i don't know if it's a school read or what, but it sells. well.

one of the reasons it's being challenged is because it's unsuitable for its age group. i'd been in my room reading. when i came across this, i went downstairs and outside, where my mother was working in the yard and told her of it. her first comment was that if teenagers are reading it, and it's classified as adult fiction, then it is unsuitable for its age group. to which i said that it's not like bookstores are putting it in teen fiction. it's shelved as adult fiction, because it's considered as such. so it's not really unsuitable for its age group, then.

she looked at me for a second, then asked if that's something i need to worry about.

so. here's me trying to make conversation with my mother about something that interests me. and here's her thinking i'm creating more anxiety for myself. or something. god knows what's going on in my mother's head, except that she seems to be constantly displeased with me. and i can't even have a conversation with her about books.

so i said something about how it hadn't worried me, that i had just found it interesting and went back inside.

those mothers and daughters who get along so well and do everything together... we don't have that relationship, she and i. i don't know who's at fault for that. i don't know how to fix it.

6 comments :

  1. funny!

    stopping by from SITS! happy Saturday!

    hope you'll stop by my blog
    www.crystalandcomp.com

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  2. Hey Picky, Yeah, the mother/daughter thing is tricky... Thanks for your comment the other day. Yikes,you did the math! Maybe I should have shared that those first 23 restaurants included the various sites managed by two chains. Or that I had once read, in The New York Times, that there were 17,000 restaurants in NY, thus encouraging me to find the right fit! Happy weekend.

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  3. Stopping by from SITS...Happy Saturday!

    As for the Momma/Daughta duels...hells ya! I am in my 30s and have children of my own and still am at my wits end with days of trying to understand or get approval from my own mother.

    I realize now that with my girls especially, telling them that one day they will grow up and will argue with me has kept them pretty close...I also try not to spoon feed them with a silver ladel! I find that if I am open, honest and understanding (and bracing myself for anything) they will get more out of the friendship-type relationship that I want for them...the one where I can still tell them what to do and them listen, while we both get something out of it. :)

    On to this book...it seems to me that you are totally knowledgable in the literature scene, and I am not going to read it, but do you have any other good reccomendations???? I am all about snark and sass with a bit of class!! (be careful that's my next blog post title...lol)

    Danon

    http://www.insatiablehost.blogspot.com
    http://www.pantypyramid.blogspot.com

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  4. It sounds as though your mom should listen to what you say more carefully and realize that you are now an adult, though still young. Please visit my blog. Thanks!

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  5. You AND your mom need to see my post today.....
    PLEASE, go see it.

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  6. I am fortunate to have one of those mother/daughter relationships in which my mom, actually my parents in general, discuss anything and hang out. There are cons to this as well since we know what buttons to push and go for them when we don't play nice. Your post made me really thankful for the relationship I have....not sure how I got there considering my mom and I used to bicker ALL THE TIME when I was in high school.

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